Let’s be real for a minute: some people are just… a lot.

You know the ones. High-maintenance energy. Habits that make your eye twitch. One too many “oops, did I do that?” moments.

And yet—those very same people are often the ones we love, live with, or lead. Which brings me to my summer-inspired relationship philosophy:

 🍉 Relationships are like watermelon.
Delicious, refreshing, and downright good for the soul… but they come with a mess of seeds.

The seeds? That’s the stuff that annoys us—the quirks, the miscommunications, the overreactions. And if you’re not careful, those little seeds can become your entire focus. And suddenly, you’re sitting there frustrated, missing out on the sweet stuff that’s still right in front of you.

So what do we do about it?

We shift our focus.

Start asking: What’s good here? What do I appreciate about this person—even if it’s just one tiny thing? What is this situation teaching me?

Maybe they’re making you more patient (ugh, I know, but still). Maybe they remind you to speak your truth. Maybe their chaos forces you to find your calm.

Every seed comes with a lesson. Every slice has some sweetness. And we get to choose what we bite into.

And let’s be honest: Sometimes we are the ones being a little “seedy,” too. 😉

Practical Tools for Navigating the “Seeds” in Difficult Relationships

Now, let’s talk strategy. Because in the real world—especially for those of us running businesses, leading teams, and juggling life—”just be grateful” doesn’t cut it. We need tools.

Here are five practical ways to handle difficult people with grace (and still enjoy the fruit):

1. Use the “Compliment Sandwich” in Tough Conversations

When you need to give feedback to a colleague, agent, or even a partner—start and end with something positive. Not fake fluff, but something true.

Example: “You’ve always had a strong eye for detail, which I appreciate. That said, I noticed the closing documents went out late again. Let’s talk through how we can make that smoother next time. I really value how committed you are to the client experience.”

Why it works: You’re acknowledging the sweet fruit, but you’re not ignoring the seeds. You’re addressing them directly, but with heart.

2. Label the Behavior, Not the Person

“You always…” and “You never…” are guaranteed to escalate things. Instead, describe what happened and how it affected you.

Example: “When I get updates last-minute, it makes it hard for me to plan the rest of my day. Can we work out a better system?”

Why it works: This keeps the conversation from becoming personal or combative—and invites collaboration instead of defensiveness.

3. Set Boundaries Like a Queen (Without Apology)

You don’t have to take every call at 9pm. You don’t have to tolerate disrespect just because someone’s “high value.”

Example: “I want to give you my full attention, and I’m currently with family. Can we reconnect tomorrow at 10?”

Why it works: You’re being respectful without abandoning your needs. Boundaries aren’t rejection—they’re clarity.

4. Don’t React. Respond.

When someone’s being rude, unkind, or just extra, train yourself to pause. Literally breathe. Count to five if you need to.

Ask: “What response reflects who I want to be—not just how I feel in this moment?“

Why it works: Emotional regulation is a power move. And let’s be honest—your calm is often more disarming than your comeback.

5. Flip the Lens

If someone is rubbing you the wrong way, try this mental reframe: “What would I see if I were watching this person with compassion?”

Maybe their rudeness is insecurity. Their bossiness is fear. Their silence is burnout.

This doesn’t excuse bad behavior—but it helps you navigate it with more grace, less reactivity.

Final Bite of Wisdom

Here’s the deal: Life’s too short to let a few irritations ruin your experience. The next time someone makes you grit your teeth, pause. Take a breath. Find the fruit.

Savor it.

You’ll be amazed what shifts when your focus does. 

And if you’re navigating a relationship that’s more seeds than sweetness right now—personally or professionally—you don’t have to figure it all out alone. Let’s talk. Sometimes a single strategy session can bring clarity, calm, and a game plan that makes all the difference.

Now pass me another slice. 🍉